Reviews For It's All For You
Name: IluvCaptainJack reviewed Chapter 1 on Sep 14, 2008 02:47 pm
I liked it. But it was really cliche and I agree with Almicene. =p Good Job though!
Name: niffer reviewed Chapter 1 on Sep 12, 2008 08:10 am
Really great story! Glad it had a happy ending.

Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing! I'm glad that you liked it.
Name: Almicene reviewed Chapter 1 on Sep 12, 2008 07:24 am
Okay good parts and parts that could use some improvement.

I like your writing style - it's a good mix of description and dialog.

The main part that I have a problem with is the plot itself. It seems very very cliche to me. It's a 'we shouldn't be together, but let's be together anyways because I can't resist you.' I feel like there's some natural progression missing. Granted it's a one shot, but there still should be some essence of Draco in here. What I mean by that is he's really sappy in here, and there's no evidence of the person we see in canon, no snarkiness, no meanness, etc.

Last criticism - it's a little weird for me that he just hops on a broom, knows instinctively to go to the Burrow in the middle of the night, and then they end up in her bedroom doing the deed (I assume) with I assume her family in the house as well.

You have potential and a good writing style, just be careful of the plausibility of your plot.

Author's Response: Thanks very much for the honest and helpftul review! I did realize it was cliche even as I wrote it, but I thought that as good a place to start as any. Something to build from, at the very least. One thing I wanted to comment on- the last bit with them waking in bed together is meant to be a random glimpse into their future, a.k.a. a fluffy bit for the ending. I believe that at some point I mention that it's their bedroom, but that's something that could easily be missed. Again, thank you for your ideas and criticisms, I will most definitely take them into account.
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