Name: b1elliot reviewed Unnatural Selection on Jan 28, 2014 10:21 pm

Good start!

Author's Response: Yay! :D

Name: Incognito reviewed Unnatural Selection on Dec 16, 2010 12:38 pm

Don't you love how I say "I'll review this on the weekend when I have more time", yet here I am? *sheepish grin*

What I like about this prologue, is that we actually see Draco being punished for his crimes. In canon (or at least what we suspect of canon) is that Draco was never punished - thanks to Harry. It's nice to know that Draco would be punished. It allows for a softer side of Draco to be revealed - and to be considered plausible.

It's also interesting how you work in the atmosphere of the new Azkaban, juxtaposing Draco's 'new' demeanour, mood. He is a man who has almost lost hope, who has made himself deaf not just to the world that surrounds and threatens to engulf him but to his own guilty conscience. Even now, after seven years have passed, he still seems to be in denial, having Fate shoulder the blame. That is not to say that Fate has no blame, but it is interesting to see how he psychologically represses things.

Yet there is hope. And you show that glimmer of hope through your analogy of a caged bird. It's quite lovely imagery - both uplifting and depressing. And the reader is left wondering where Draco will fly off to. Will he be able to fly, or will he be caught in the storm of inevitability?

Good job, as usual, Jessica. ^_^

Author's Response: Thanks, Lia. n_n I like how you can catch all that. In the beginning, I think I was just writing to be writing (I had such a hard time with this story because of RL things upsetting me, so nothing would come out), but I did want to do something different. I always TRY to do that, anyway. I like to think that Draco would have gotten off without punishment if Harry would have spoken for him, but I wanted to change that for this story. We also normally see Draco as a kind of fighting spirit, in some ways. But I think Half-Blood Prince showed us that he isn't that strong on the inside, though he tries to act like he is. I wanted that to come back out after the war. What else could he do? He messed up, whether he admits it or not. His life is the way it is now because of his decisions, so why should he make decisions anymore? Maybe he'd be better off if someone else made his decisions for him. I really like the imagery of the bird too. In a cage. Like his rib cage. X)

Anyway, thanks a lot for the review. You're very eloquent, aren't you? I think you put into words what I was going for much better than I could have. n_n