Memories of her by Nival Vixen
Summary: Draco Malfoy sat in the dungeon quietly, remembering. He tried to block out the memories of her, but they kept haunting his mind; she kept haunting him. More memories of her ran through his head, even as he shook it to try and stop them. They were always of her... Only her...
Angst and descriptiveness involved!
Categories: Completed Short Stories Characters: None
Compliant with: None
Era: None
Genres: Angst, Drama, Horror
Warnings: Blood, Character Death, Graphic Violence, Non-consensual sex, Sexual Violence
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: 3630 Read: 2851 Published: Feb 15, 2006 Updated: Feb 16, 2006

1. Chapter 1 by Nival Vixen

Chapter 1 by Nival Vixen
Author's Notes:
As said in the warnings: this is very angst and descriptive. Be warned!

Disclaimer: Don't own Harry Potter, don't sue.

WARNINGS: Angst. Really, really angst... Sadness... Some language. There is also descriptive torture. Do not read this if you don't like the warnings given!

The tense switches from third to first person, I hope you don't mind!

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Draco Malfoy sat in the dungeon quietly, remembering. He tried to block out the memories of her, but they kept haunting his mind; she kept haunting him. More memories of her ran through his head, even as he shook it to try and stop them. They were always of her... Only her.

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I wasn't able to stop them from killing her. They forced me to watch and laughed as I struggled to be free to get to her. They laughed as she died in front of them. I couldn't stop her death and so I have been tortured by her memory every day since.

They let me go after they were certain she would die. I went over to her as if in a daze. I couldn't speak; my tears seemed to be blocking my throat as well. She didn't say anything as they tortured her, but now... She said a few words to me before Death took her, then she smiled that smile of hers and left me. Left me forever...

I remember thinking of how I'd broken my Pensieve days before our capture because it was filled with too many images and memories of her. It seems that the memories from there all came back, and I am forced to watch each and every one, hour after hour. I tried to keep count of the days since her death, but I usually wake up, not knowing whether it's night or day, so that stopped very soon after it began.

I always try to stop from watching her death. I close my eyes and try to think of other things so I don't hear their laughter; her death. It never works. I can only watch...

I'm bound up and held back by three men. I recognise them, but I don't know their names anymore. Details have become irrelevant. I only see her; I only know her. She kicks one of the men as he strips her then tries to kiss her and I yell at him to leave her alone. He sneers over at me, then ties her up to a stake. He puts his filthy lips on hers and begins touching her. He's not allowed to do that. She doesn't want him to do that; I don't want him to do that. He does it still. She looks at me and I feel completely helpless. The man pulls away grinning madly, then pulls a dagger from his robe. He begins slicing her body, cutting her legs, her stomach, chest, face. Everything he touches immediately turns red and cuts appear on her body. I try to get free again. They laugh and hold me tighter. She doesn't make a sound, so I scream and cry for her. He cuts her arms, his dagger travelling up towards her shoulders and neck. I yell at him to stop, but the man keeps cutting my only love into pieces right before my eyes. Finally, he looks at me sneering, and puts his dagger at her throat. He says something to me, but I can't remember it. I don't even think I heard what he said. I just saw her, heard her ragged breaths, and her whisper telling me not to tell him. She smiles at me, even as her throat is cut. She says one more thing to me, but even then, my brain can't figure out what words meant. They unbind me and I run over to her. She's still smiling, and her breaths are getting shorter. She slides down the stake and closes her eyes, her last breath never passing through her red lips.

Their laughter rings in my ears even as I kill them. I go easy on the three who held me and I only break their necks. The one who watched and laughed the loudest, I use the dagger in his robe to kill him. I save the man who killed her for last. He looks at me with barely suppressed fear, no longer laughing. I use the bloody dagger in my hand to slice his face, and then I cut his wrists and listen as he suffers, dying slowly. I go over to her and wrap her body in one of their cloaks. They won't need it anymore. I close her eyes. Someone outside calls and the door bursts open. I watch her being pulled away from me, her red blood stained on my robes, on my hands. Someone hits me with the Cruciatus Curse and even though I fall to my knees, I don't feel or say a thing.

The memory fades, and other ones replace it, but it soon returns to that one.

I am vaguely aware of what's happening around me, but I mostly don't pay attention. There were loud noises outside of my cell some time ago. An hour, a day, a week, a month, what does it matter? It's not unusual for them to get drunk and make loud noises, even though these noises were slightly different. I feel cold air come into the room as the door opens. I don't even look up. A voice says my name and I look up warily. I recognise the person standing there, but his name is unknown to my brain anymore.

He grabs my arm, looking shocked, and pulls me outside. I follow without argument, without a word. If they kill me, I will be silent, as she was. I am taken outside. Do they wish to taunt my with the sunshine for one last time before my life is taken from me? I say nothing. I am taken away to a different place, probably by Apparation, even though I don't feel the usual constriction. There's only pain, anguish and loss in me; there is no room for anything else besides her. The man who took me outside pushes me into a large house and says something, but I don't know what words mean anymore. What does anything mean anymore? Suddenly I'm in someone's arms and there's no air left to breathe. So they are going to kill me by suffocation? So be it... I'm pushed away and I see her staring at me, looking confused. I whisper her name before I faint and my silent, haunted world is filled by darkness.

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Molly Weasley took Draco to a bed then looked at Harry in confusion. Harry shrugged in response.

"That's the first word he's said since I got him out of that place. Ron's interrogating one of the Death Eaters we found with Ginny's body. He was barely recognisable," Harry said thinking of the man's wrists that were cut open and his face that had been sliced into pieces. Amazingly, he was still alive and able to talk. "The wounds were given to him only last night. Ron's trying to find out who did it to him, why, and why he was with Ginny's body," Harry said. Molly nodded, sniffing.

"I still can't believe that Ginny's dead... And in such a horrible way too..." She said crying again. Harry hugged Molly tightly, then looked at Draco.

"You'll be all right with him, Mrs. Weasley?" He asked. Molly nodded, then sat by her son-in-law's bed. Harry touched her shoulder lightly, then left quickly to find Ron.

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Ron was sitting outside of a room, his face so pale that Harry thought he'd died. Ron jumped when Harry said his name.

"Ron? What's wrong?" He asked quietly. Ron looked at him, shocked.

"They forced him to watch her die, Harry. They tied Malfoy up and tortured Ginny right in front of him, then they cut her throat. He sounded so proud about it. She didn't scream at all. Not once did she scream. She smiled, even as they killed her. You know all those wounds on him? It was Malfoy, Harry. Malfoy did that to his own father... He killed all of the others too, with his bare hands. Broke their necks, stabbed them with their own weapons, then he did him last because he killed Ginny. It wasn't because he'd forced him to watch, or he'd stabbed him, or even for capturing them. Malfoy killed his father because he hurt and killed Ginny. Apparently Malfoy hasn't had anything to eat or drink since they captured him two weeks ago. He gave it all to Ginny... He didn't touch one thing; he made Ginny eat it all. Did you know she was pregnant, Harry?" Ron asked in disbelief. "She didn't tell us..." He said.

"No, I didn't know... Do you want to go talk to Draco now? He thought your mum was Ginny and fainted clean out on the floor," Harry said.

Ron nodded, still pale and let Harry Apparate him back to 12 Grimmauld Place; both of them knowing that Ron wouldn't be able to Apparate on his own due to his shock.

"Molly? Ron's here to try and see if Draco will talk to him about what happened," Harry said. Molly nodded and stood up. Harry and Molly left Ron alone with Draco, closing the door behind them. Draco woke up quietly and saw Ron sitting beside him, looking pale.

"Why didn't Ginny tell us she was pregnant?" He asked immediately. Draco didn't answer. Ron's words were forming in his mind and he began to understand what they meant. He still stayed silent. "Malfoy? I know you heard me... Why didn't she tell us?" Ron asked again, more authority in his voice. Draco looked away from him.

"Get Molly," he said quietly. He didn't use an authoritative tone, or make his voice in any way demanding, but Ron still nodded and walked outside. Molly walked in with a parchment full of questions, looking nervous. Draco looked at her, sorrow and pain in his eyes. "Ask me anything and I'll tell you, but only you," he said softly, before she could get Harry or Ron inside. Molly nodded and sat beside him.

"Is it true that Ginny was pregnant?" She asked, not even looking at the parchment. Draco nodded slowly. "Why didn't she tell us?" Molly asked, sounding upset.

"She'd found out that day and we were going to tell you the night we were captured. That's why she owled you to come over for dinner," Draco replied. "She kept saying that it was a girl. She wanted a girl so badly," Draco said.

It was ironic how he didn't feel anything. It was like it happened to someone else, and he was telling their life, not his. Not hers...

"Were you taken before You-Know-Who at any point during your capture?" Molly asked, trying to read the questions through her blurry vision.

"Ginny didn't leave the cell, but I saw him for about a minute. He only asked me where it was, and when I didn't answer or let him into my mind, he put me under the Cruciatus Curse and made them drag me away," Draco replied.

"What was he asking for?" Molly asked curiously.

"My family fortune. We knew that we were under suspicion from them so we took all of the money out, which meant that he had no money to survive, or feed the Death Eaters. It's in the locket in Ginny's jewellery box at home. If you take the spell off it, all of the money will be there, including some extra. It's yours; for you and your family," Draco said. Molly began to protest, but Draco cut her off. "I have no wish to keep it. All of the money is yours. Can you get Harry or Ron to get my notary so I can change my will please?" Draco asked, his voice still emotionless. Molly nodded then did as he asked. Draco waited until the door was shut completely to tell Molly to continue.

"Why did you kill the Death Eaters?" She asked.

"They hurt Ginny. They laughed as they tortured her, laughed as I tried to stop them. They killed her," he said so softly that Molly had to strain to hear. She blinked away her tears and looked down at the parchment to ask the next question.

"Did you tell them anything? If so, what?"

"I didn't tell them a thing. I couldn't. Ginny had put a spell on me so I wouldn't talk. We had been under the impression that we were going to your house you see, so she didn't want me to announce the news before everyone was there. I knew the spell had gone when she died, but I still didn't say anything. This is the first time I've talked since they killed her... How long has it been? Days, weeks, months?" Molly looked at him in shock.

"It's only been twenty-two hours, according to your father, that is," she said.

"Only twenty-two hours? Why do I feel so much older then?" He asked quietly, more to himself than to Molly. She put a hand to her throat, and tried not to cry.

"That's all of their questions... I have one to ask of you," she said. Draco nodded. "Did she say anything to you before she died?" Molly asked softly. Draco nodded, remembering the words he hadn't been able to figure out before.

"She told me that our baby was to be called Elizabeth. 'Call her Elizabeth', that's what she said," Draco said softly. Tears filled Molly's eyes as she watched her son-in-law look away to hide his own, then she left the room quietly.

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"Mr. Malfoy. I wasn't expecting to see you again so soon. I'm sorry to hear about your wife," said Mr. Timmins, the notary.

"Not as much as I am Mr. Timmins... Not as much as I am," Draco said softly. "You've brought everything, I presume?" He asked. Timmins nodded and sat beside him.

"What would you like to change in your will?" He asked.

"I want a proper burial for my wife Ginevra Molly Malfoy and our daughter, Elizabeth Molly Malfoy. I want all of my money to go to the Weasley's. Molly knows where it is... They can do with it as they like, I don't care. I want Malfoy Manor to be given to Harry Potter to be used either for the Order Headquarters, or for his home. Ronald and Hermione Weasley are to have the house in London, for the same purpose, if need be. All jewellery, antiques and collectables can be kept by the Weasley's or Potter. Anything else can go to museums, returned to their proper owners if stolen, or sold for charity. Blaise Zabini is to receive nothing of mine," he said. Mr. Timmins coughed an apology.

"That won't be necessary, Mr. Malfoy. You killed him. You broke his neck," he said quietly. Draco nodded.

"I thought that was him... Anything else in my possession that I have left out will go to the Weasley's or Potter. If none of them want anything, then it will go to charity, museums, etc. Lastly, I want to be laid next to my wife when I'm dead," Draco said. Mr. Timmins looked at him in shock.

"Are you sure you wish to plan something that is so far away?" He asked, trying not to say what he meant. Draco nodded with a small smile.

"It is not that far away, Timmins and I want it done," he said. Mr Timmins nodded.

"I will have to get someone to read over this and be a witness when you sign it," he said.

"Potter," Draco said. Mr. Timmins went outside and came back inside with Harry. "Who would have thought that you'd be signing my will, hey Potter?" Draco asked with an ironic smile. Harry frowned at this, then read over the will.

"You don't have to give me anything..." He said, looking at Draco, who nodded.

"I know that I don't... Ginny always said that I had to be nicer to you, Potter. I'm being nice, so let it go," he said. Harry nodded, then kept reading down the parchment.

"What if you get married again?" He asked Draco.

"I won't marry someone I don't love and I won't love anyone except Ginny. Sign the parchment Harry, so I can get some rest," he said. Harry did as he said, more out of shock from Draco calling him by his first name than anything else. Mr. Timmins held the quill out to Draco solemnly.

"Are you sure you want to do this, Mr Malfoy? You still have a long time to live," he said. Draco took the quill.

"I understand that, Timmins. I am quite sure... I have no life without her and a long time to live is too much for anyone. I will go peacefully, and I just hope you remember me for the better things I did in my life rather than the proud schoolboy I was," Draco said looking to Harry, who only just realised what he'd actually done. He paled, and tried to grab the parchment off of Timmins.

"Take my signature off of that, right now!" Harry demanded. Mr. Timmins shook his head sadly.

"It's too late, it's already been done," he said, showing him the blank piece of parchment. Harry let go of him in shock, and Mr. Timmins shook Draco's hand before tipping his hat to Harry and leaving. Harry looked at Draco.

"So you're just going to kill yourself then?" He asked. Draco smiled and shook his head.

"I'm not going to kill myself, Potter. I died when she did," Draco said. "They killed her, and me with her. I'm just... finishing the job," he said. "You might understand one day..." He said with a smirk, reminding Harry of the boy he had been at Hogwarts. "Can you bring Molly and Ron in so I can say goodbye?" Draco asked quietly. Harry nodded and went outside.

Molly and Ron walked in quietly, both pale and their eyes red from crying. The words that Draco had been going to say caught in his throat and he looked down to hide his tears.

"I'm sorry I couldn't save her," he whispered. Molly burst out into tears.

"It's not your fault, Malfoy. They tied you up and put an immobilisation spell on you. You couldn't have saved her," Ron said and patted Draco on the back.

"That's no fucking excuse, Ron! They killed her in front of me and I couldn't stop them! I should have been able to fight it, to stop them... I just watched her being tortured and she died in my arms... I couldn't stop them," Draco whispered, pure emotion blocking his throat. "I just wanted to say goodbye to you both..." He said, then looked at them, his tears flowing.

"Where are you going? Aren't you staying for Ginny's funeral?" Ron asked.

"Oh, I'll be there..." Draco replied. "Goodbye Ron. Ginny told me to say goodbye to you while we were captured. I think she knew she wouldn't make it out alive," he said then looked away again. Ron nodded and swallowed the lump in his throat. "Can I talk to Molly alone, please?" Draco asked.

"Yeah... Bye. We'll see you at... her... funeral," Ron said and left. Molly looked at Draco, knowing that he was going to be at the funeral in a different way from what Ron expected.

"You don't have to do this, Draco," she said softly. He looked at her, tears still forming in his eyes.

"Don't I, Molly? If you had lost your only family left in the world, would you have a choice?" He asked. Molly was silent, but tears fell.

"We're still your family," she said after a while. Draco looked at her and shook his head.

"We both know that's not true, Molly... Your sons only put up with me because Ginny threatened them," he said smirking. He sighed for a moment then looked away. "Please, go now so I may get some rest," Draco said sounding tired again. Molly hugged her son-in-law and kissed the top of his head before leaving. "Goodbye," he whispered.

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Memories still flew through my mind... As usual, they were always of her... I fell asleep soon after Molly and Ron had left, hating the world. It wasn't right that the world could continue to go on when it's life and heart had died. The sun shone to spite me and I turned my back on the world.

Ginny smiled at me and laughed as she twirled in the sky.

"Come with me, Draco! Come join me!" She called but as much as I tried I could never reach her... I woke up in the middle of the night sobbing to myself.

I turned to face the world again and saw that the moon was out and shining brilliantly. I realised why everything was continuing... The world was continuing in respect for Ginny. The sun and moon shone to mourn her, the rain poured to cry for her, animals and people alike lived to tell of her... Everything was for her, including my life... I watched the moon travel across the sky as soon my eyes closed.

As I feel asleep Ginny entered my mind, yet again. She was wearing white and smiling, her arms wide open. This time it was different as our daughter was with her, smiling at me happily. My wife called me again and I held Ginny in my arms, as I had the last time we were alive. I had finally reached her...

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