Name: Anonymous reviewed Chapter 5 on Apr 20, 2006 07:46 pm

This story is like shifting sand. The landscape and the plot and the characters keep changing so that I don't understand what's going on. I read chapter one and then came back later and read chapter 2. I had to go back to chapter one to make sure I was reading the right story they were so disconnected. Lucifer is Draco's brother? How can you trust a git with a name like that who acts like an angel? Ginny's depressed and suicidal and then not? What is the relationship history between Draco and Ginny? Friends, not friends, enemies, did they ever date? Lucius apologizes and Molly says "okay, go spend the summer with the man who tried to kill you a few years ago"? What drug is she on? Malfoy Manor is in Wiltshire, England so what's up with Scotland? Am I mistaken or are you speaking of a different Malfoy house? While I enjoy and appreciate plot twists and turns as much as the next reader, I feel your story has too many twists and turns and not enough of a stable plot. As a parting review, I will leave my thoughts up to this moment, based on my understanding of your plot thus far. Something devious and diabolic is on the horizon, and I think Draco tried to protect Ginny by pushing her away. I think Lucifer is actually much more evil than Draco, maybe sent in to make sure Draco carries through with whatever devious plan the Malfoys have in store for her. Lucifer could be a Polypotioned Lucius (or other DE) for all we know. Good luck with your fic. This is where I get off.

Author's Response: Thanks SOOOO much for your honest review and input. I may just go back and take another look at things myself, because you're right, there is quite a bit of disconnect between chapters. The main reason is I started it a couple of years ago, and although I did some editing, I need to do some more. Thanks again for the honest critique, I'll definitely take a look at a lot of things that I apparently need to look at. ~Lyss