Author's Notes: I want to give a big thank you to all my readers and reviewers. This story has made it this far because of you. I also want to thank fallenwitch, for all the work she did on this story. She is an amazing beta and friend. And finally, a thank you to my new beta, Embellished, for making this chapter amazing. I'm so glad to have her on board. Please leave a review as you leave. It might even help me write faster. :)
Chapter 12: Gray is in the Wind
Ginny’s scarlet hair streamed out behind her as she flew down another hallway long past midnight. Draco’s striped shirt was wrinkled from a long night of studying. She had untucked it from her skirt somewhere between her Potions essay and Transfiguration notes. Thunder rolled overhead and lightning illuminated the silent corridors. A raw, deliriously happy laugh escaped her lips as she turned another corner.
Somehow, Ginny had managed to get through all of her homework even though she kept seeing flashes of Draco’s stormy eyes and soft blond hair. His voice rang in her ears. I love you. I love you. I love you.
Her studying had gone hours later than Ginny had expected, and they hadn’t even met up at dinner. Once, she had looked up from her Charms bookwork to see him standing in the doors of the library. He had taken one look at her books before smiling and turning around again.
She jumped a little as another roll of thunder sounded. When she had returned to her room to finally claim a few hours of sleep, she had put away all of her books and notes and essays to find that she wasn’t tired in the least. Her heart had thumped wildly in her chest at the mere thought of Draco, and without another second of consideration, she had flown back down the stairs, through the common room, and back into the airy castle.
Ginny whispered the password lightly as she arrived at his door. Before her eyes could adjust to the darkness of his spacious room, lightning flashed at his window and illuminated the giant bed and its sleeping figure.
She hovered awkwardly by the door, unsure if it was acceptable to crawl into your boyfriend’s bed in the middle of the night.
Ginny stood by the door, breathing lightly for a few minutes, catching glimpses of Draco’s sleeping form when lightning illuminated the room. After what seemed like hours, she crept slowly to the side of his bed and kicked off her shoes before climbing upon it.
His face was beautiful as he slept, as she had noted before. There was something almost artistic about it: the way his blond eyelashes spread out so evenly, and how his sharp nose and chin were so perfectly paralleled. She ran her thumb over his lips, recalling how they tasted of mint.
He shifted restlessly beside her, and Ginny backed away, fearing that she had woken him. But she saw almost immediately that his agitation had nothing to do with her gentle touches. His body tensed and he began shaking beneath her. His eyes rolled beneath his lids, and Ginny understood that he was dreaming.
“Shh,” she soothed.
He fell still beside her, his face pale and glistening with sweat as thunder clashed above them. Draco’s lips parted, and soft indiscernible sounds slipped from between them. Ginny leaned closer to hear him.
“No,” he moaned in a whisper. “Save her, save her…Mother!”
His eyes burst open suddenly, a shade of gray as dark as the rumbling clouds outside. He gasped for breath, his chest rising and falling rapidly. “No!” he cried.
Ginny fought the urge to back away from him in fear, and instead reached out a hand to rub his back. As his eyes came into focus, he looked at her in shock. “Ginny? Ginny, what are you doing here?”
“Shh,” she whispered. “Never mind. Go back to sleep.”
She slid off his bed and unzipped her skirt, letting it fall to the floor. Dressed only in his collared shirt and her knickers, she climbed back into bed with him.
When she burrowed under the blankets and curled up beside him, Draco looked at her in confusion and asked, “What are you doing?”
She smiled up at him. “Shh, go back to sleep. I’m just going to stay here for a while.” And with that, she closed her eyes and fell asleep.
***
In Draco’s dreams, silky blonde hair fanned out around him, drawing his eyes back to his mother’s pale face. Her skin was so blue-white and her hair was so fair that she looked almost transparent, dying in her giant bed.
Her eyes fluttered open, and she gave Draco the smallest of smiles. “Don’t worry about me,” she whispered. “He’s punishing us. There’s nothing you can do to save me. No one can.”
Suddenly, Potter was at her bedside. “You can save her, you know,” he said quietly as Narcissa faded back into sleep. “It’s only Dark Magic that’s keeping her this way.”
And then Draco’s nightmares released him. Ginny’s face hovered above his, and he dreamt no more.
It seemed like only moments later when he woke, secure in his own bed.
When Draco felt the light touch of hair tickling his chest, he was afraid he might be dreaming again. Slowly, he cracked one eye open. But the long, silky hair lying across his chest was a deep, rich scarlet instead of a shade of blonde.
Well then I am dreaming, he reasoned, opening his other eye to see Ginny curled up beside him in his bed. Good dream.
Content to accept that he was dreaming, Draco smiled and nestled closer to his imaginary Ginny. But before he could fall back asleep, reality sunk in.
Shit! Draco sat straight up in bed. What the hell was Ginny doing in his bed? She adjusted slightly in her sleep beside him.
Draco felt his face soften as she nuzzled closer to him in her sleep. He found it damn impossible to look at her beautiful, sleeping form and stay distraught. She was still wearing his collared shirt which was wrinkled and soft and had seen better days.
God, he loved her. He loved her faded, fraying clothes and her too-loud laugh. He loved her fiery hair that held shades of gold and red and orange. He loved that she wore his clothes with a sort of secret pleasure, and that she left her intoxicating scent behind on his things.
The previous night came back to him in fuzzy, sleep-clouded flashes. It had been Ginny who had stopped his nightmares.
He cautiously tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. As she lay perfectly still beside him, his mind hummed with contentment and adoration. But suddenly, the comforting whirring came to an abrupt halt.
If she had been there the night before, and she had stayed, she must have seen him dreaming. Draco was no fool; he knew that he must talk when he dreamed of his mother. Had she really seen him like that? Pale and shaking and calling for his mother? She must think him a coward.
Potter wasn’t a coward. He was off saving the world. Someone as beautiful and fierce and strong as Ginny didn’t deserve a coward. She had seen him trembling and drenched in sweat in the dark of night, when sleep revealed his imperfections.
How dare she come into his room in the middle of the night? Had she no shame? He couldn’t help his dreams, but it was her fault for barging into his room in the middle of the night!
She stirred beside him again. Draco shook her roughly, his voice gruff. “Ginny. Ginny, wake up!”
She came to slowly. Her eyes blinked furiously, but a smile spread across her face as she recognized him hovering above her. “Morning.”
His resolve weakened slightly, but he looked at her angrily. “What are you doing here?”
She sat up, smiling uncertainly. “I came to see you last night, but you were dreaming. So I just thought-”
“You thought what? That you would stay and hold my hand through my nightmares? That I needed someone to fix all my problems?” he cut in angrily.
Ginny’s face fell, and her voice softened. “Draco, no, what-”
“Because I don’t need anyone to fix anything! Not you, not Potter.”
“Draco, what are you on about? I just wanted to stay here with you.” Ginny’s voice was pleading and her eyes were wet.
Draco faltered at the sight of her tears. He sighed. “Look, I’m sorry,” he offered, his voice softening. “Maybe you should just go. I’ll see you later, okay?”
Ginny nodded slowly. She leaned over to kiss him on the cheek, and the salty tears running down her face wet his own. She slid off the bed and into her skirt before saying, “If that’s what you want.”
He nodded to himself as she shut the door. After she left, it only took a few seconds for the weight of his mistake to crash down on him.
“Shit.”
***
Ginny’s heartbeat thudded loudly in her ears, her mind a dangerous blur with only one clear focus.
Because I don’t need anyone to fix anything! Not you, not Potter.
Why the hell had he mentioned Harry? Because the noble asshole had done something. What exactly he had said to Draco, Ginny didn’t know, but she wasn’t going to sit around and wonder about it.
She rushed through the castle just as she had the night before, but it wasn’t a delirious happiness that gripped her heart; it was something more akin to panic.
Ginny burst out of the castle doors, gulping in the cold air to calm her spinning head. But instead of allowing her the feeling of freedom, the winter air seemed to bring the weight of the world down upon her. Her eyes blurred a little at the edges as she looked across the grounds and spotted a dark-haired figure sitting near the lake.
She had known exactly where he’d be. The lake was a multitude of things to Harry. In some ways, it was their spot, where they had first walked hand in hand after that fateful Quidditch match. But it was his mourning place, too. He had once told her that if he looked long enough, he could see Sirius’s face swirling in the black water.
The wind whipped Ginny’s hair out behind her wildly as she made her way across the frosty lawn. The frigid air made her eyes tear further, until the world became a blur of black and white.
“Harry Potter!” Her voice was as crisp and icy as the air that surrounded them.
He turned slowly, as if he had been expecting her. “Hullo, Ginny,” he answered, his voice heavy and sad.
His face was crumpled with pain and sorrow. There were no tears in his eyes, but Ginny suspected that he had cried all of his tears by now. Under normal circumstances, she would have felt bad for confronting Harry when he was in such a state, but these weren’t normal circumstances, and Ginny couldn’t hesitate.
“Harry, why are you back?” she demanded of him. She kept her voice harsh for fear that any weakness would cause tears to erupt.
“Gin, I don’t think-”
“No, Harry. You owe me at least this. Why are you back?”
He sighed heavily, backing into a tree and sliding to the ground. “You’re right, I do owe you this. The Order sent me here to retrieve some information.”
She raised her eyebrows at him. He should know that that wasn’t a sufficient answer.
“The Order thinks that Voldemort might have left something at Hogwarts. I’m here to check out the old Slytherin prefect record books that he kept during his seventh year.” He spoke to the ground, his eyes refusing to meet hers.
Ginny stiffened angrily. Harry never refused her eye contact unless he was lying. His eyes always gave him away. “Don’t you bleeding lie to me, Harry. What the hell did you say to Draco?”
Harry’s head snapped up. “How did you know that I talked to Malfoy? Wait, what is this? Why are you so pissed about why I’m here?”
Shit. She hadn’t meant to bring up Draco like that. She stared at the frost-covered ground. Harry’s emerald gaze burned into her.
“I need Malfoy’s help with something at his manor,” Harry began slowly, his voice laced with confusion. “Were you listening to that?”
“No, forget about that, Harry. I know you’re not here for the record books, so tell it to me straight.”
“I already told you! The Order needs something at the Malfoy Manor that we can’t get without Malfoy. Did you – did you just call him Draco?”
“I-” Ginny faltered. Had she? Had she been that careless? “No, I didn’t,” she replied firmly. “What exactly do you need from the manor?”
“It’s not important, Ginny,” Harry insisted, his eyes focused firmly on the ground.
“It is important,” Ginny screamed, her frustration growing with each of his lies. “Whatever you said to him-”
“Wait. Whatever I said to Malfoy? How do you know that I talked to Malfoy?” Harry asked.
“I…” Ginny faltered.
“What’s going on? What the hell do you care about Malfoy? He tried to kill your brother, Ginny. He tried to kill Dumbledore!”
“No he bloody didn’t!” Ginny cried.
“Ginny, what are you doing? You’re not…friends with him, are you?”
“What do you care? You gave up all rights to care about me or know what I do when you left me behind. So just stay out of shit that isn’t your own!” she screeched at him. Ginny could feel her panic level rising. She hadn’t meant for Harry to find out that she and Draco were anything, much less involved. But her anger and hurt were threatening to burst forth and her tears weren’t far behind. Why did he insist upon lying to her? Didn’t she deserve the truth? After all she’d been through, couldn’t he just give her the truth?
Harry was gazing at her with pure bewilderment. The frigid wind whipped his messy hair every which way, howling around the both of them. “Ginny, what’s happened to you? Why are you so…?”
“So what, Harry?” she snapped, her anger rising in her throat.
“I was going to say different,” he replied cautiously.
“But you meant to say forthright. I can’t repress myself anymore. I can’t be what everyone else wants me to be. I’m not a princess made of glass.”
“But you and Malfoy….why are you…?”
Ginny felt something inside her snap. She wasn’t going to hide anything from him, because she had nothing to hide. He had made his choice, and now she had made hers.
“Oh, bloody hell, Harry! Just say spit it out,” Ginny moaned in frustration. “I’m in love with Draco Malfoy, all right? Are you happy? And hell, I don’t know what you said to him, but you’d better bloody fix it because if you don’t…” She gasped for air, the tears pouring down her face and landing on the frozen ground. “If you don’t, I’ll never forgive you.”
Harry stared up at her, his eyes widened in shock and his mouth hanging open. “Ginny, do you realize-”
“Yeah, I know,” she cried hysterically. “His father’s a Death Eater and Voldemort is out to get him. But you know what, at least he’s here. At least he chose me over the whole world.”
Harry rose to his feet and brought her into a hug, holding her shaking form against his chest. “I’m so sorry, Gin. I’m so sorry.”
“What did you say to him, Harry? What did you say?” she murmured into his chest.
“Shh, Gin. I asked him for his help, but he refused,” Harry answered soothingly, as if talking to a small child. He hugged her closer.
“Of course he did! What reason could you give him for helping you?” Ginny felt her anger resurfacing in the face of Harry’s obliviousness. Did he really think Draco was just going to drop whatever he was doing and help Harry Potter on his quest to save the world?
“His mother’s really sick, did you know that? She’s dying. The Order needs something from his father’s hidden library, but there might also be something in there to save his mother. We think Bellatrix secretly bound her to Voldemort, and he’s what’s keeping her so sick.”
“Oh, God. What do you want him to do?” Ginny whispered. She tilted her head back away from his chest, feeling inexplicably safe in his arms. Horror gripped her, and her own screaming voice sang in her head. She knew what it was like to be bound to Voldemort.
“I need him to come with me, Ginny. That’s why I came back. He’s the only one who can open that library.” Harry looked down at her as he said this, as if his sad green eyes could make her forgive his reasons for returning.
Ginny felt her eyes widen. Harry wasn’t back for her; he was back to save the world. She didn’t even have to decide if she wanted him to love her because the decision had been made for her. He obviously didn’t. And here he was, threatening to take Draco on his noble quest. He wouldn’t take her, but he could sure as hell take the only person who really loved her. How dare he? How dare he?
“You want to take him with you?” she demanded shrilly, pulling herself away from Harry. It was lies, all of it lies. He had done nothing to earn her trust, he just needed her. His obsession had possessed him; he would do anything to defeat the Dark Lord, even if it meant leaving a trail of broken souls and crushed hearts in his wake. “It’s not enough for you to leave me behind, but you want Draco to leave me as well. Well sod off, Harry. He said no, so just leave him alone.” Ginny turned and began walking back to the castle, shattering the icy blades of grass that stuck up like knives beneath her.
“Ginny!” Harry called after her. There was desperation in his voice, and she could hear him trying to control it. She slowed to hear him say, “Ginny, if you really loved him, you would convince him to go with me. It’s the only way to save his mother, and she’s all he’s got left.”
Ginny whirled around again. “You’re wrong Harry,” she spat fiercely. “He’s got me!”
Harry approached her, stopping only inches from her face. “But are you really going to make him choose between you and his mother?”
His breath curled in front of her as her tears froze to her face. Harry’s eyes pleaded with her, burning into her soul along with his words. She didn’t want to give anything to him, he didn’t deserve it. But she knew that if Draco didn’t help his mother now, he would regret it for the rest of his life. Could she really keep him here with her, knowing that? No, she wouldn’t be that selfish.
“No,” she whispered, her voice catching. “I won’t.”
Harry nodded. “Then convince him to come with me.”
Ginny’s scarlet hair streamed out behind her as she flew down another hallway long past midnight. Draco’s striped shirt was wrinkled from a long night of studying. She had untucked it from her skirt somewhere between her Potions essay and Transfiguration notes. Thunder rolled overhead and lightning illuminated the silent corridors. A raw, deliriously happy laugh escaped her lips as she turned another corner.
Somehow, Ginny had managed to get through all of her homework even though she kept seeing flashes of Draco’s stormy eyes and soft blond hair. His voice rang in her ears. I love you. I love you. I love you.
Her studying had gone hours later than Ginny had expected, and they hadn’t even met up at dinner. Once, she had looked up from her Charms bookwork to see him standing in the doors of the library. He had taken one look at her books before smiling and turning around again.
She jumped a little as another roll of thunder sounded. When she had returned to her room to finally claim a few hours of sleep, she had put away all of her books and notes and essays to find that she wasn’t tired in the least. Her heart had thumped wildly in her chest at the mere thought of Draco, and without another second of consideration, she had flown back down the stairs, through the common room, and back into the airy castle.
Ginny whispered the password lightly as she arrived at his door. Before her eyes could adjust to the darkness of his spacious room, lightning flashed at his window and illuminated the giant bed and its sleeping figure.
She hovered awkwardly by the door, unsure if it was acceptable to crawl into your boyfriend’s bed in the middle of the night.
Ginny stood by the door, breathing lightly for a few minutes, catching glimpses of Draco’s sleeping form when lightning illuminated the room. After what seemed like hours, she crept slowly to the side of his bed and kicked off her shoes before climbing upon it.
His face was beautiful as he slept, as she had noted before. There was something almost artistic about it: the way his blond eyelashes spread out so evenly, and how his sharp nose and chin were so perfectly paralleled. She ran her thumb over his lips, recalling how they tasted of mint.
He shifted restlessly beside her, and Ginny backed away, fearing that she had woken him. But she saw almost immediately that his agitation had nothing to do with her gentle touches. His body tensed and he began shaking beneath her. His eyes rolled beneath his lids, and Ginny understood that he was dreaming.
“Shh,” she soothed.
He fell still beside her, his face pale and glistening with sweat as thunder clashed above them. Draco’s lips parted, and soft indiscernible sounds slipped from between them. Ginny leaned closer to hear him.
“No,” he moaned in a whisper. “Save her, save her…Mother!”
His eyes burst open suddenly, a shade of gray as dark as the rumbling clouds outside. He gasped for breath, his chest rising and falling rapidly. “No!” he cried.
Ginny fought the urge to back away from him in fear, and instead reached out a hand to rub his back. As his eyes came into focus, he looked at her in shock. “Ginny? Ginny, what are you doing here?”
“Shh,” she whispered. “Never mind. Go back to sleep.”
She slid off his bed and unzipped her skirt, letting it fall to the floor. Dressed only in his collared shirt and her knickers, she climbed back into bed with him.
When she burrowed under the blankets and curled up beside him, Draco looked at her in confusion and asked, “What are you doing?”
She smiled up at him. “Shh, go back to sleep. I’m just going to stay here for a while.” And with that, she closed her eyes and fell asleep.
In Draco’s dreams, silky blonde hair fanned out around him, drawing his eyes back to his mother’s pale face. Her skin was so blue-white and her hair was so fair that she looked almost transparent, dying in her giant bed.
Her eyes fluttered open, and she gave Draco the smallest of smiles. “Don’t worry about me,” she whispered. “He’s punishing us. There’s nothing you can do to save me. No one can.”
Suddenly, Potter was at her bedside. “You can save her, you know,” he said quietly as Narcissa faded back into sleep. “It’s only Dark Magic that’s keeping her this way.”
And then Draco’s nightmares released him. Ginny’s face hovered above his, and he dreamt no more.
It seemed like only moments later when he woke, secure in his own bed.
When Draco felt the light touch of hair tickling his chest, he was afraid he might be dreaming again. Slowly, he cracked one eye open. But the long, silky hair lying across his chest was a deep, rich scarlet instead of a shade of blonde.
Well then I am dreaming, he reasoned, opening his other eye to see Ginny curled up beside him in his bed. Good dream.
Content to accept that he was dreaming, Draco smiled and nestled closer to his imaginary Ginny. But before he could fall back asleep, reality sunk in.
Shit! Draco sat straight up in bed. What the hell was Ginny doing in his bed? She adjusted slightly in her sleep beside him.
Draco felt his face soften as she nuzzled closer to him in her sleep. He found it damn impossible to look at her beautiful, sleeping form and stay distraught. She was still wearing his collared shirt which was wrinkled and soft and had seen better days.
God, he loved her. He loved her faded, fraying clothes and her too-loud laugh. He loved her fiery hair that held shades of gold and red and orange. He loved that she wore his clothes with a sort of secret pleasure, and that she left her intoxicating scent behind on his things.
The previous night came back to him in fuzzy, sleep-clouded flashes. It had been Ginny who had stopped his nightmares.
He cautiously tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. As she lay perfectly still beside him, his mind hummed with contentment and adoration. But suddenly, the comforting whirring came to an abrupt halt.
If she had been there the night before, and she had stayed, she must have seen him dreaming. Draco was no fool; he knew that he must talk when he dreamed of his mother. Had she really seen him like that? Pale and shaking and calling for his mother? She must think him a coward.
Potter wasn’t a coward. He was off saving the world. Someone as beautiful and fierce and strong as Ginny didn’t deserve a coward. She had seen him trembling and drenched in sweat in the dark of night, when sleep revealed his imperfections.
How dare she come into his room in the middle of the night? Had she no shame? He couldn’t help his dreams, but it was her fault for barging into his room in the middle of the night!
She stirred beside him again. Draco shook her roughly, his voice gruff. “Ginny. Ginny, wake up!”
She came to slowly. Her eyes blinked furiously, but a smile spread across her face as she recognized him hovering above her. “Morning.”
His resolve weakened slightly, but he looked at her angrily. “What are you doing here?”
She sat up, smiling uncertainly. “I came to see you last night, but you were dreaming. So I just thought-”
“You thought what? That you would stay and hold my hand through my nightmares? That I needed someone to fix all my problems?” he cut in angrily.
Ginny’s face fell, and her voice softened. “Draco, no, what-”
“Because I don’t need anyone to fix anything! Not you, not Potter.”
“Draco, what are you on about? I just wanted to stay here with you.” Ginny’s voice was pleading and her eyes were wet.
Draco faltered at the sight of her tears. He sighed. “Look, I’m sorry,” he offered, his voice softening. “Maybe you should just go. I’ll see you later, okay?”
Ginny nodded slowly. She leaned over to kiss him on the cheek, and the salty tears running down her face wet his own. She slid off the bed and into her skirt before saying, “If that’s what you want.”
He nodded to himself as she shut the door. After she left, it only took a few seconds for the weight of his mistake to crash down on him.
“Shit.”
Ginny’s heartbeat thudded loudly in her ears, her mind a dangerous blur with only one clear focus.
Because I don’t need anyone to fix anything! Not you, not Potter.
Why the hell had he mentioned Harry? Because the noble asshole had done something. What exactly he had said to Draco, Ginny didn’t know, but she wasn’t going to sit around and wonder about it.
She rushed through the castle just as she had the night before, but it wasn’t a delirious happiness that gripped her heart; it was something more akin to panic.
Ginny burst out of the castle doors, gulping in the cold air to calm her spinning head. But instead of allowing her the feeling of freedom, the winter air seemed to bring the weight of the world down upon her. Her eyes blurred a little at the edges as she looked across the grounds and spotted a dark-haired figure sitting near the lake.
She had known exactly where he’d be. The lake was a multitude of things to Harry. In some ways, it was their spot, where they had first walked hand in hand after that fateful Quidditch match. But it was his mourning place, too. He had once told her that if he looked long enough, he could see Sirius’s face swirling in the black water.
The wind whipped Ginny’s hair out behind her wildly as she made her way across the frosty lawn. The frigid air made her eyes tear further, until the world became a blur of black and white.
“Harry Potter!” Her voice was as crisp and icy as the air that surrounded them.
He turned slowly, as if he had been expecting her. “Hullo, Ginny,” he answered, his voice heavy and sad.
His face was crumpled with pain and sorrow. There were no tears in his eyes, but Ginny suspected that he had cried all of his tears by now. Under normal circumstances, she would have felt bad for confronting Harry when he was in such a state, but these weren’t normal circumstances, and Ginny couldn’t hesitate.
“Harry, why are you back?” she demanded of him. She kept her voice harsh for fear that any weakness would cause tears to erupt.
“Gin, I don’t think-”
“No, Harry. You owe me at least this. Why are you back?”
He sighed heavily, backing into a tree and sliding to the ground. “You’re right, I do owe you this. The Order sent me here to retrieve some information.”
She raised her eyebrows at him. He should know that that wasn’t a sufficient answer.
“The Order thinks that Voldemort might have left something at Hogwarts. I’m here to check out the old Slytherin prefect record books that he kept during his seventh year.” He spoke to the ground, his eyes refusing to meet hers.
Ginny stiffened angrily. Harry never refused her eye contact unless he was lying. His eyes always gave him away. “Don’t you bleeding lie to me, Harry. What the hell did you say to Draco?”
Harry’s head snapped up. “How did you know that I talked to Malfoy? Wait, what is this? Why are you so pissed about why I’m here?”
Shit. She hadn’t meant to bring up Draco like that. She stared at the frost-covered ground. Harry’s emerald gaze burned into her.
“I need Malfoy’s help with something at his manor,” Harry began slowly, his voice laced with confusion. “Were you listening to that?”
“No, forget about that, Harry. I know you’re not here for the record books, so tell it to me straight.”
“I already told you! The Order needs something at the Malfoy Manor that we can’t get without Malfoy. Did you – did you just call him Draco?”
“I-” Ginny faltered. Had she? Had she been that careless? “No, I didn’t,” she replied firmly. “What exactly do you need from the manor?”
“It’s not important, Ginny,” Harry insisted, his eyes focused firmly on the ground.
“It is important,” Ginny screamed, her frustration growing with each of his lies. “Whatever you said to him-”
“Wait. Whatever I said to Malfoy? How do you know that I talked to Malfoy?” Harry asked.
“I…” Ginny faltered.
“What’s going on? What the hell do you care about Malfoy? He tried to kill your brother, Ginny. He tried to kill Dumbledore!”
“No he bloody didn’t!” Ginny cried.
“Ginny, what are you doing? You’re not…friends with him, are you?”
“What do you care? You gave up all rights to care about me or know what I do when you left me behind. So just stay out of shit that isn’t your own!” she screeched at him. Ginny could feel her panic level rising. She hadn’t meant for Harry to find out that she and Draco were anything, much less involved. But her anger and hurt were threatening to burst forth and her tears weren’t far behind. Why did he insist upon lying to her? Didn’t she deserve the truth? After all she’d been through, couldn’t he just give her the truth?
Harry was gazing at her with pure bewilderment. The frigid wind whipped his messy hair every which way, howling around the both of them. “Ginny, what’s happened to you? Why are you so…?”
“So what, Harry?” she snapped, her anger rising in her throat.
“I was going to say different,” he replied cautiously.
“But you meant to say forthright. I can’t repress myself anymore. I can’t be what everyone else wants me to be. I’m not a princess made of glass.”
“But you and Malfoy….why are you…?”
Ginny felt something inside her snap. She wasn’t going to hide anything from him, because she had nothing to hide. He had made his choice, and now she had made hers.
“Oh, bloody hell, Harry! Just say spit it out,” Ginny moaned in frustration. “I’m in love with Draco Malfoy, all right? Are you happy? And hell, I don’t know what you said to him, but you’d better bloody fix it because if you don’t…” She gasped for air, the tears pouring down her face and landing on the frozen ground. “If you don’t, I’ll never forgive you.”
Harry stared up at her, his eyes widened in shock and his mouth hanging open. “Ginny, do you realize-”
“Yeah, I know,” she cried hysterically. “His father’s a Death Eater and Voldemort is out to get him. But you know what, at least he’s here. At least he chose me over the whole world.”
Harry rose to his feet and brought her into a hug, holding her shaking form against his chest. “I’m so sorry, Gin. I’m so sorry.”
“What did you say to him, Harry? What did you say?” she murmured into his chest.
“Shh, Gin. I asked him for his help, but he refused,” Harry answered soothingly, as if talking to a small child. He hugged her closer.
“Of course he did! What reason could you give him for helping you?” Ginny felt her anger resurfacing in the face of Harry’s obliviousness. Did he really think Draco was just going to drop whatever he was doing and help Harry Potter on his quest to save the world?
“His mother’s really sick, did you know that? She’s dying. The Order needs something from his father’s hidden library, but there might also be something in there to save his mother. We think Bellatrix secretly bound her to Voldemort, and he’s what’s keeping her so sick.”
“Oh, God. What do you want him to do?” Ginny whispered. She tilted her head back away from his chest, feeling inexplicably safe in his arms. Horror gripped her, and her own screaming voice sang in her head. She knew what it was like to be bound to Voldemort.
“I need him to come with me, Ginny. That’s why I came back. He’s the only one who can open that library.” Harry looked down at her as he said this, as if his sad green eyes could make her forgive his reasons for returning.
Ginny felt her eyes widen. Harry wasn’t back for her; he was back to save the world. She didn’t even have to decide if she wanted him to love her because the decision had been made for her. He obviously didn’t. And here he was, threatening to take Draco on his noble quest. He wouldn’t take her, but he could sure as hell take the only person who really loved her. How dare he? How dare he?
“You want to take him with you?” she demanded shrilly, pulling herself away from Harry. It was lies, all of it lies. He had done nothing to earn her trust, he just needed her. His obsession had possessed him; he would do anything to defeat the Dark Lord, even if it meant leaving a trail of broken souls and crushed hearts in his wake. “It’s not enough for you to leave me behind, but you want Draco to leave me as well. Well sod off, Harry. He said no, so just leave him alone.” Ginny turned and began walking back to the castle, shattering the icy blades of grass that stuck up like knives beneath her.
“Ginny!” Harry called after her. There was desperation in his voice, and she could hear him trying to control it. She slowed to hear him say, “Ginny, if you really loved him, you would convince him to go with me. It’s the only way to save his mother, and she’s all he’s got left.”
Ginny whirled around again. “You’re wrong Harry,” she spat fiercely. “He’s got me!”
Harry approached her, stopping only inches from her face. “But are you really going to make him choose between you and his mother?”
His breath curled in front of her as her tears froze to her face. Harry’s eyes pleaded with her, burning into her soul along with his words. She didn’t want to give anything to him, he didn’t deserve it. But she knew that if Draco didn’t help his mother now, he would regret it for the rest of his life. Could she really keep him here with her, knowing that? No, she wouldn’t be that selfish.
“No,” she whispered, her voice catching. “I won’t.”
Harry nodded. “Then convince him to come with me.”
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