“Sp—n.”

Draco’s voice crackled and faded out indistinctly as Ginny blinked down at the small phone, shaking it slightly. Muggle phones were hard to use between wizards, but Draco was not about to contact Ginny via floo powder after his last encounter with her husband. Instead, he had had his owl deliver this.

“What?” she asked again, pressing the phone against her ear.

“Ginny, they’re in Spain.”

Ginny swallowed with difficulty, glancing around her empty kitchen. “You’re sure?” she asked, her voice thick with emotion.

“Positive. I can’t tell what hotel they’re staying in, they paid with cash, but Scorpius used the bank in Barcelona. My son’s incapable of going anywhere inconspicuous,” he said, no doubt shaking his head on the other side of the phone.

Ginny sat down at the kitchen table, picking at the sleeve of her bathrobe. “When are we leaving?” she asked quietly.

“I can’t hear you, Gin.”

She cleared her throat, attempting to speak clearly, “I asked when we were leaving, Draco?”

There was a pause and Ginny chewed on her lower lip in anticipation.

“You don’t need to go with me, Ginny.”

She swallowed.

“I do,” There was a slight hitch in her voice and she prayed Draco didn’t hear it.

“I could just as easily bring them back myself.”

“She’s my daughter,” Ginny argued, feeling tears blurring her vision. “If she’s in Spain, then I’m going. When do we leave?”

“I have an Apparition point set up to leave at ten. I can get a second ticket.”

“Do that,” Ginny sniffed, glancing at the clock in the kitchen and seeing she had just over an hour to get ready and get there. Her cereal stood untouched in front of her.

“Meet me at the station?” Draco asked.

“Mmhmm,” Ginny nodded, “I’ll be there.”

There was another pause and Ginny pressed her fingertips against the corner of her eyes, restraining her tears from falling.

“I’ll see you then.”

There was a click and the phone went silent.

*

Finally dressed and cleaned up, all traces of her tears gone, Ginny stepped out of the bathroom and went into the bedroom to her closet, pulling out her passport, identification cards, anything she would need to leave England.

“What are you doing?” Harry asked from behind her, his voice gruff and unused.

“I’m getting Lily back,” Ginny answered curtly, filling her purse.

Harry’s eyes widened, “W-where is she?”

“Spain.”

“I-I’ll call their Embassy, their Aurors, have one of them pick her up…” he said, getting ahead of himself, just wanting his daughter home. He hadn't slept the last two nights that she’d been gone and it showed in his hollow eyes, lined by dark circles.

“I’m picking her up, Harry,” Ginny turned to face him, her face expressionless.

Harry blinked. “Then I’m coming with you,” he said, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

“No, you’re not,” she said quietly, her mouth a thin line.

“Ginny, you can’t be serious…”

“I am. I’m meeting Draco at the Apparition point in thirty minutes and I’m going to go with him to Spain and find Lily and bring her home.”

Harry took a step back, unable to meet her eyes. “I don’t believe this…”

“Harry…”

“You’re going with him… and you think that will convince her this family isn’t falling apart?” he questioned angrily, his jaw tightening, eyes bright in pain, pain that Ginny was inflicting.

Ginny took a deep breath, forcing herself to meet his eyes, knowing what she was putting him through. “You need to let me go,” she said quietly but firmly.

“No…” he shook his head, blinking rapidly.

“Yes, Harry. You prove you can trust me, or I’ll walk out of this house forever.”

“Trust you? You want me to trust you? Then don’t do this!”

”Harry…”

“This isn’t fair,” he choked. “You’re just being selfish and cruel; it never ends with you, does it? He has this sick hold on you that I just don’t understand anymore!”

“And when have you ever tried?” she demanded shrilly, her eyes suddenly bright as she took a step forward to face him. “How dare you accuse him of any of this!”

“Oh, go on and defend him! You always did!” Harry snapped, throwing his hands up in anger. “Defend that son of a…”

“ENOUGH!” she snapped, her eyes blazing and heart hammering out of her chest. “Enough, Harry…” she repeated more quietly, almost soothing. “Let it go and please, please just let me go.”

He deflated in an instant, looking utterly lost as his shoulders fell and his anger vanished, replaced by cold fear. “And let you what?” he rasped, “Let you go straight back to him?”

“I never said that…”

“You may as well have…”

“Look, Harry… I…” she broke off suddenly, seeing that tears had begun silently sliding down his face.

Ginny mouthed wordlessly, watching each tear fall. She was ripping him open and in that moment, all of her strength seemed to leave her. Standing there in silence, Ginny was simply hollow and empty inside. All the usual warmth in her eyes was gone, diminished to nothing. She no longer knew who she was… But seeing those tears, her heart seemed cold and lifeless.

“Look at me, Harry,” she said, trying to keep her voice strong.

He did and she felt nothing but emptiness stretching forever between them. Who was she becoming?

“We’ve got a lot to work on,” she acknowledged. “I admit I'm confused, and I’m sure that helps nothing, but you have to let me go do this and you have to trust me this once or there is nothing we will ever be able to do to save this marriage.”

He swallowed with difficulty, forcing himself to suppress his anger and fear. “What if,” he began. “What if I c-can’t trust you? Ginny, I’m trying,” he pleaded, “but I just can’t anymore.”

Something broke inside her and without warning, Ginny’s own face was wet with tears. She took in a shuddering breath, trying to breathe but her chest was tight. She cursed quietly under her breath.

“Then,” she gulped, trying to regain her composure. “I guess I’ll have to settle for you trying… really trying, Harry,” she whispered.

Her husband’s eyes fell shut. “If I say no?” he shuddered.

She shook her head, her only control left forced into that single act of defiance.

Harry pulled her into a tight embrace, his grip a vice. “I hate that you keep doing this to me,” he choked, arms encircling her, hands trembling, and then tightening their grip around her. “I hate you for doing this, again and again…”

Ginny closed her eyes, her chest constricting painfully over her heart. “I hate both of us,” she whispered. The silence her words caused seemed to dig itself into both of them, scraping against some dark and ugly truth. Harry was utterly silent.

With a rattling breath, he loosened his grip, pulling slightly away to meet her gaze. The tracks his tears had left stood out sharply on his skin, but his eyes were suddenly dry. “If I don’t… let you go…” he breathed, “You’ll never stop hating me, will you?”

Ginny cast her mind back, thinking, remembering her husband’s fist slamming cabinets in the kitchen, throwing plates in his rage, she thought of how he’d arrested Draco the night before and what he’d done to him. Her eyes narrowed, taking in her husband’s searching gaze. And then she remembered those same green eyes, intense and unforgiving, demanding an answer from her so many years ago in the flat she had shared with Draco. Had she always hated him? Ever since that moment? No…

“I don’t hate you, Harry,” she murmured, shaking her head slightly. “I just don’t know who we are anymore, either one of us…”

His jaw tightened. “This is a damn poor time to try and figure that out with Malfoy’s help, don’t you think?” he bit out.

Ginny let out a sigh, like a weary laugh. “That’s just the point, Harry. I don’t need anyone’s help; no one’s but my own this time. “

He said nothing, his expression stony and silent.

“You know I’m bringing her back,” she said, trying to give him something. “I’m bringing Lily back, Harry. I’ll be back.”

He rolled his shoulders, glancing away but forcing himself to nod. “Go then.”

Hesitantly, Ginny leaned forward and kissed his still wet cheek, wondering if she ever would kiss him again. The thought left her with a strange and uneasy feeling in her stomach and she pulled away.

He glanced down at her, his intense green gaze holding hers. Was he thinking the same thing?

She swallowed. “If we can get through this, just today,” she told him, “maybe then we have a chance.”

He didn’t respond.

Lowering her gaze, Ginny turned and left the room, silent tears suddenly pouring down her cheeks. She hastily wiped them away as she headed down the hall, passing her sons’ room, their light snores drifted down the hall after her and Ginny paused without thinking. She listened for a full minute, her eyes slowly welling up with tears as she listened to her sons, still fast asleep. Unable to stop herself, she glanced back over her shoulder, taking in the sight of their sleeping forms. James was sprawled out across his bed, the sheets tossed off in every direction and tangled around him. Albus though appeared not to have moved at all, curled on his side as though he had fallen asleep trying to make himself as small as possible. Ginny watched as their chests rose and fell in time.

She was an awful woman. A horrid mother.

Right then, she glanced over to Lily’s empty room, the door still open. Her daughter’s absence hung like a weight over the house and it descended on Ginny now, filling her with self-loathing. No, she would not be a horrid mother. If she broke every last thread that held her family together, if all of that was sacrificed by her actions these past weeks, it didn’t matter. She would be damned if she didn’t find Lily and bring her home, regardless of what home there was left.

Shaking herself back to her senses, Ginny looked down at her watch. It was time to go. She went downstairs as silently as she could, and quietly shut the front door behind her. The lock clicked, and she took in a shaky breath, steeling her nerves. Opening her eyes, she let go of the handle, vanishing with a soft pop!

*

Ginny arrived at the Apparition point, looking nervously around for a familiar head of white blond hair. Finally, she spotted Draco in his designer suit.

He had already seen her and was making his way through the crowd to her.

The bruises on his neck stood out even more in the daylight and Ginny inhaled sharply, already reaching out to touch them.

He caught her hand in his, grey eyes guarded. “Are you ready to go?” he asked softly.

She nodded, carefully removing her hand from his.

With a hand on her shoulder, Draco led her to the left side of the room towards their Apparition point.

The next few minutes passed in a blur of activity as Ginny had security guards scan their wands over her, checking all that she carried and searching through her purse with a quick revealing charm. She had to answer a series of questions as to the nature of her visit and faltered when they asked when she would be returning to England.

“As soon as possible,” Draco answered, his own arms held aloft as they scanned their wands over him, well used to protocol after traveling so much for his career. Finally they were both approved and were allowed to move to the area the security wizards indicated.

Ginny nervously tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and Draco held his hand out to her. She looked up at him and his silver eyes met hers, for once inviting. Her lips turned up at the corners and she slipped her hand in his. His fingers lightly pressed down on hers before they vanished from the station with an echoing crack and Ginny saw such a whirlwind of light and flashing colors that it could have been lightning.

*

Lying on the ground, her face pressed up against the smooth floor, Ginny finally blinked her eyes open. There was a palm against her forehead; Draco’s concerned face hovering over her.

“You okay?” he asked kindly.

She struggled to open her eyes fully, groaning softly. “What was that?” she winced.

Draco’s mouth quirked up at the corners. “International Apparition’s not for the faint of heart,” he smiled.

“I think I’m going to be sick,” she muttered.

“You already were,” he chuckled. “Fainted on me. Don’t worry, it wasn’t messy, but if you must insist on losing your breakfast as well, I think I ought to move out of the way.”

“Please stop… talking…” she breathed.

Draco felt her forehead again, his concern leaving him. “You’re alright,” he assured her. “Just breathe for a minute and I’ll help you up.”

Ginny nodded, finally she held out her hand, allowing Draco to help pull her to her feet. She felt dizzy and leaned heavily against him, embarrassed with herself.

“How did Lily do this?” she cursed under her breath.

Draco laughed and, putting his arm around her, helped support her.

Finally, Ginny looked around and saw that they were in the corresponding Apparition point and judging from the foreign words on all the signs, the swell of language all around, and the sun baking them through the clear sky lights, they were in Spain.

*

The first thing they did was flag down a vehicle similar to the London Knight Bus that careened to a sudden halt in front of them. Ginny groaned aloud but Draco helped her up the steps, insisting that she trust him.

He helped her into the seat right behind the driver and immediately began conversing with the driver in rapid Spanish, gesturing towards Ginny and asking the driver to be careful on sharp turns and sudden stops.

The driver readily agreed, laughing heartily as he looked back at Ginny, nodding again and laughing.

“What did he say?” Ginny questioned as Draco sat beside her.

Draco grinned to himself.

“What did he say?” Ginny repeated, looking scandalized.

Draco laughed, shaking his head, “He thinks you must not be able to handle your liquor either if the Apparition’s affecting you this bad.”

Ginny flushed pink, but soon turned green as the rickety bus took off with a bang. Feeling nauseous, Ginny put her head between her legs, trying not to be sick as the bus hurtled towards Barcelona.

The trip was vomit-inducing, but Ginny managed to keep from becoming sick, counting sheep in her head, concentrating on nothing else.

To the driver’s credit, when they finally reached their destination, the bus came to a rolling stop rather than the screeching it was accustomed to. The driver laughed again upon seeing Ginny’s white face, her hands trembling as she pushed her hair back from her face.

Draco said something back in Spanish that made the wizard laugh, finally paying him and helping Ginny off the bus.

It took off again like a shot, but Ginny was safely on the ground and didn’t mind in the slightest, sinking into a chair at an open air café. The streets were full of Spaniards and tourists, no doubt some wizards hidden in there somewhere.

“Hey, you going to be okay?”

“Yeah, now that the world has stopped spinning. I’m sorry, Draco. I didn’t realize I would be this much of a liability.”

“Hey, we’re here, aren’t we? And the bus certainly didn’t go any slower for your sake, so I’d say you didn’t delay us at all.”

Ginny took in a breath, briefly closing her eyes. “Why are you being so nice to me?” she asked quietly.

Draco closed his mouth, his throat tightening. “I just don’t want Lily to find her mother in hysterics because she can’t hold her lunch,” he smirked, the humor not reaching his eyes.

Ginny couldn’t help her small smile, knowing he was just making an excuse to put off her questions for the time being.

He quickly changed subjects. “We need to find a hotel.”

“No, we need to find Lily and Scorpius,” Ginny insisted.

“And we don’t know how long that will take, which is why we need to find a hotel. You can rest and get to feeling better, and I can start asking questions around town.”

Ginny didn’t look convinced, wanting only to find her daughter as soon as possible.

“It’s a big city, Gin.”

“Right, okay then,” she nodded, standing up again. “Which way do we go?”

*

The hotel was a beautiful building, tall and historic without being intimidating. Draco led Ginny inside and she looked around in wonder at the open arches to the outside, views of the city all around them.

She felt disappointed that she couldn’t go with Draco to search the city.

The concierge was speaking with Draco in Spanish, Ginny watching curiously when Draco suddenly turned red, shaking his head and holding up two fingers.

Ginny turned beet red as well, glancing quickly away. If they had accidentally reserved a single bed... She shook her head to herself, trying to put it out of her thoughts.

Finally Draco handed her a key, slipping his own in his pocket. “I’ll be back when I can. I want to get a chance to ask as many questions as possible around the city.”

Ginny nodded, “You’ll be okay without me?”

Draco laughed. “Well, seeing as you can’t speak Spanish, you’ve never been here before, and are just now recovering from all the travel, yeah, I think I can manage,” he smirked.

Ginny elbowed him with a roll of her eyes, finally taking a few steps back. “Good luck,” she told him.

He smiled back and left, leaving her with her thoughts and only a room key.

She turned and made her way up the stone staircase that climbed the outside wall of the building, coming out on the second floor, which overlooked the pool and thriving plants in the summer heat. She finally reached her room, the last door on the left, and slipped the key in the lock turning it. Inside, there were two queen-sized beds and a nightstand between them. Ginny inspected the bathroom, and then the closet, shaking her head and mentally berating herself when she realized she had only packed one extra set of clothes. She had expected this trip to be over quickly, and the change of clothes was only a precaution. Instead, she was waiting in a hotel while Draco simply asked questions. He didn’t know where Lily and Scorpius were any more than she did, and now she was worried.

Sitting heavily on one of the beds, Ginny started biting her nails, realizing just how little thought she had put into this. She was in Spain with Draco Malfoy, sharing a hotel room, with a single change of clothes and no idea how to find her daughter or how long it would take.

Glancing at the bed beside her, she was suddenly overcome and stood up, grabbing her purse and her room key. Separate beds were a start, she told herself, but what they needed were separate rooms. She marched down to the concierge, and caught herself. She didn’t know Spanish. Cursing her idiocy, Ginny wished she knew if the man were a wizard and could use her wand to explain, but that would be foolish. Instead, she mimed writing with a pen to him, gesturing until she could make him understand that she needed a piece of paper.

He nodded, smiling and hurried back to the room behind the desk to fetch one, handing her a pen and paper.

Ginny spent the next several minutes trying to explain her sketch of two beds and two rooms, trying to make him realize she needed to make a change, pointing from one drawing to the other.

Finally the man laughed, realizing what she was saying, he answered her in his very broken English.

“No one room,” he said, holding up a finger and smiling, “Two room?” He held up two fingers, pointing at Ginny’s drawing.

She smiled in relief and said yes in Spanish, one of the only words she knew in the language.

But the man shook his head, shrugging his shoulders. He pointed at her drawing and shook his head again, holding up a zero with his fingers. All their rooms were full for the night.

Ginny thanked him anyway and turned away, wondering what she was going to do.

*

Ginny awoke to a hand lightly shaking her, blinking in the slight darkness of the room, only fractions of the fading daylight seeping in from the window curtains.

“Hey, get up, Gin. It’s nearly dark out.”

Ginny slowly pushed herself up to a sitting position on the bed, blinking tiredly up at Draco who stood above her.

He flicked his wand and the lamps came to life, the small bright lights helping Ginny take in her surroundings.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sleep so much…”

“No, it’s good. You should be feeling better now, right?” he asked, sitting down near her feet, looking at her.

“Listen,” he began, looking down, “I’m sorry about the room. I thought I had told him two rooms, not two beds in one room. They’re all full for the night… so…”

“I know, I already asked,” Ginny informed him.

“Oh… good.”

An awkward silence grew between them, Draco finally clearing his throat. “Anyway, we’ll get it sorted out in the morning and change to separate rooms but for tonight… we’ll have to make do. It’s not like we haven’t lived together before, right?” he joked lightheartedly, likely as nervous and uncomfortable as Ginny.

This was just too close to everything they didn’t want to do. The hotel, the shared room… Ginny shook her head, clearing her thoughts.

“What did you find out?” she asked, changing the subject to the actual reason they were both there.

“I checked around a handful of the hotels, including this one before we checked in, but no one’s seen them. There is a man who’s seen a boy that looks like Scorpius in his shop for the past two days. He said he looked lost the first day and that’s how he noticed him. And a woman at the market swears she’s seen Lily. She couldn’t stop talking about her red hair,” he laughed.

“Guess the Weasley hair stands out everywhere,” Ginny shrugged with a smile that soon disappeared. “You don’t think we’ll find them tonight? That it’s not worth searching?”

“Of course it’s worth it, it’s just unlikely. Look, we have a few clues; we’ll keep looking in the morning.”

Ginny nodded, agreeing that would be best.

“I assume you haven't eaten anything?”

She shook her head, and Draco offered her a hand, deciding to go to the hotel restaurant for dinner.

The meal was unlike anything Ginny had ever had, but she couldn’t fully enjoy it, lost in thoughts about Lily and Harry and most of all the man sitting across from her. Draco didn’t speak much during dinner, no more than small comments here and there about the food. Ginny felt herself grow frustrated, finally understanding why Draco hadn’t wanted her to come. They couldn’t be around each other after everything that happened. They wanted to, she felt sure of that, but under the circumstances, their marriages, they simply couldn’t. It was too painful to be so close together, to touch or laugh and know none of their past could be brought up now. It was like being in a cage, seeing what she wanted standing right before her eyes, but being unable to reach it.

Seeing the glint of gold on her ring-finger, Ginny felt a pang of sorrow. She glanced at Draco’s hand and saw his wedding band as well. No wonder the concierge had put them in one room; they looked like a married couple.

Suddenly Ginny wasn’t hungry anymore and she set down her fork. “I think I’m going to make a phone call.”

Draco looked up, realizing what she meant and nodded. “I’ll see you tonight, then.”

Ginny’s eyes widened until she finally realized he meant the hotel room, mentally berating herself. She made a small noise of agreement and got up from the table, leaving the restaurant and returning to the front lobby, where she had to act out another game of charades with a different concierge until her could point her in the direction of a phone.

Ginny finally dug through her purse for Muggle coins, hoping she could make the phone work and feeling lonelier than ever upon realizing she didn’t have any Spanish currency. Tears started falling down her cheeks and she hastily moved to wipe them away when the concierge saw, his expression one of empathy.

Unnoticed by Ginny, he left his place by the desk and moved towards her, slipping a coin into the slot from behind her.

Ginny spun around to face him, her tearful face breaking out into a grateful smile. “Gracias.” she said, butchering the simple word.

The boy smiled and returned to the desk, leaving Ginny with the phone.

Searching her memory, Ginny dialed the number of the cell phone Draco had sent her earlier that morning, the phone she’d left sitting on her kitchen counter at home.

Harry picked up on second ring, his voice gruff. “Hello?”

“Hi, Harry, it’s me.”

“Hey,” he breathed.

For a moment neither said a word.

“Are you still trying?” she asked with a slight hitch in her voice.

“Yeah,” he sighed, “I’m trying, Gin… but…”

“Me too, then.”

There was a sigh of relief from the other end of the line and Ginny felt tears pricking at the corners of her eyes once more. “I’ve only got a minute left on this Muggle thing,” she said. “We’re going to keep looking for Lily in the morning. Dra—” she caught herself, “Malfoy thinks we can find her by then…”

“Good. Sounds good.”

“I need to go then.”

“Goodnight, Ginny…”

“Goodnight.”

She hung up the receiver with a soft click, staring at the Muggle phone and trying to get a hold of herself. She had to go up to the room now, she realized, wiping helplessly at her eyes. She gave the boy at the desk a final smile and started up the outside staircase, heading to her and Draco’s room.

Author notes: Thanks all for being so patient. This has just been a busy semester. The good news is there are only 2 chapters and an epilogue left to go, so fingers crossed for me finishing it sooner. Thanks to DGgirl as always for her beta-ing!